violence, even if aimed at educational purposes, "can not be considered lawful," he established the Supreme Court (May 16, 1996)
Raise your hands, to impose by force parental authority, with anger to pour their frustrations on their children, threaten, humiliate, making the child feel more short of expectations has always been a social evil, perhaps too hushed. Indeed, perhaps no. There are no beatings "mild" or "innocent" any violence means more humiliation, abuse of power, and deeply hurt the other, denying him the respect and dignity. The physical and psychological violence on children usually presents as a chain reaction that is often handed down from father to son. The 'Mala' education is suffered repeated from generation to generation, as if the only possible and practicable. The consequences of all this go on for a lifetime, as the body memory as the mind, therefore, tends to keep to himself suffered the experience of aggression, aggression that the adult turned against other individuals and perhaps mainly to the his children. And even if at first stesso.Paura is the key word. Afraid of everything. Fear of making mistakes. Fear of not being up to the demands of her father. Fear of punishment that awaits him at the first misstep. Afraid to love. Fear of living. Only fear. The wounds of gratuitous violence - because it is - albeit disguised behind the word 'education', 'respect for parents', not heal easily. The humiliation, abuse of power by the subjugation of another, it means deprivation of their dignity as human being, 'ridimenzionato', reduced to obedience, 'straightened out' the will of another is deprived of its name and self to become something else. To become what the parent has in mind for them and not what you hear instead of being intimately, to become, to express. So far from education, the use of 'strong measures' results as well as the growth interruption, an interruption to life. A dominance and terror, which is nothing but a push to not exist. To hide. A close. A disappearing world and universe belong exclusively to his executioner that does something to shape it at will. It 's the law of the jungle. The abuse of power over the weak. The centuries pass, and history repeats itself with a ferocity unmatched. The 'father, master,' which seems to evoke images in nineteenth-century reality, even today, in the third millennium, it appears as a submerged but ubiquitous phenomenon, he continues to take in hand their children with physical and psychological violence, venting upon them anger over the years, of those who may in turn suffered the same treatment. All this can not be justified. You can do something? I think so. Institutions can do something. The school can do something. But you know, break down ignorance is the hardest thing in the world. Obviously the first thing you always talk about it. Do not be silent. Denounce. Educating parents and children to dialogue, to eradicate the concept of 'punishment' in this country, too often, is still space and supporters.
"There will come a day when education will be worth as a hundred foreign ministries" (T. Eliot)
Under a carry-over 'interview I did with a person who has really lived on her skin over the violence that I have tried to parse through the text - too few and too cold - To describe the pain, suffering, but also a desire for redemption, to return to live with those who have suffered an injustice, an abuse.
will therefore his words to make sense of my own.
Usually in the life of an adult's memories of childhood, early youth identify with and lighthearted moments we have experienced. In your case there must be a reversal of almost paradoxical in relation to this perception. Would you tell?
Unlike those who had a happy childhood, or at least balanced, who has been the father master, who can not identify all the past in one word "hell" and even if there were some good moments, are put aside, we do not think calmly but with deep bitterness toward what could be a constant rather than sporadic moments of "normal" I'm an adult who has over 30 some years yet I have clear memories of ' Children, beatings of my mother and I was trying to put myself in the middle to stop it, the barrel of me and my mother was put in the middle and took leiposso also mention two episodes just to give you an idea, the less raw but sums up everything you've written in precedenzanoi the ban had to go play in the room and it was even more so when they were forbidden to visit relatives with children of our etàuna evening I went to the latter prohibition against and I went with my sister and my cousin in the room to play, when they left my father railed against me took me by the wrist and threw me into the air, my hand ran into a glass frame and cut my , the scar is still evident there, but the thing that most impressed me is the fury in his eyes ..... it has always been his eyes in those moments and I could not understand why .... ... As for the second I've always had a mania for taking things apart and reassembling them, one day I had taken a lighter that did not work and dismounted, he noticed it and beating down, beating me on the edge of the temple a mobile me diets thrashing e. ......... after 10 minutes I looked I smiled, kissed me and said come down from playing ....... I was literally shocked on these two episodes I can tell you that I had not yet 10 years but I had already noticed his eyes full of violent and anger, confusion and bewilderment felt already, someone was playing with dolls and who was to be a doll ............ see how disruption of memories that can not be clean and deep, rather than remember and feel anger, bitterness, pain, it is preferred, at least for me so, pretend nothing has happened, not to talk or if you must, do it with fake posting to shame, it feels different than the others and can not otherwise be seen that this is what you were taught, diversi, inferiori, sottomessi, sbagliati, dove la propria personalità viene totalmente annullata.........
Quando si parla di violenza perpetrata tra le mura domestiche si pensa subito alla violenza fisica. Ma spesso è la violenza psicologica quella più difficile da superare. Quello che si ricorda maggiormente è la paura che un comportamentoviolento suscita nella sua vittima. E’ così?
Si è così, ma non solo......si ha paura di tutto, si ha paura di una reazione violenta da qualsiasi parte arrivi, che sia verbale o fisica poco importa in quel momento ci si sente spiazzati, bloccati si cerca in qualche modo di evitare lo scontro anche quando si è certi di avere ragione, anche maybe when the "danger" at that moment coming from someone who does not even know, and then hypothetically you might think "not him / her know that I care" is absolutely not so for me the terror comes not only from what I just wrote about, but also and above all I'm afraid of hurting others, of being violent as he was with me, he could not control myself, I have spent a lifetime fighting with myself for not being like him, I did not want to do is what I did at times I could not and I felt bad for guilt, then punivo myself, downloaded on myself all the frustration and anger, and even these scars are clearly visible.
What is astonishing and upsets when you hear about domestic violence is the silence, the silence that surrounds the victims. One wonders whether it is possible to overlook certain things, especially from people who have daily contact with us. What do you mean in that regard?
Raise your hands, to impose by force parental authority, with anger to pour their frustrations on their children, threaten, humiliate, making the child feel more short of expectations has always been a social evil, perhaps too hushed. Indeed, perhaps no. There are no beatings "mild" or "innocent" any violence means more humiliation, abuse of power, and deeply hurt the other, denying him the respect and dignity. The physical and psychological violence on children usually presents as a chain reaction that is often handed down from father to son. The 'Mala' education is suffered repeated from generation to generation, as if the only possible and practicable. The consequences of all this go on for a lifetime, as the body memory as the mind, therefore, tends to keep to himself suffered the experience of aggression, aggression that the adult turned against other individuals and perhaps mainly to the his children. And even if at first stesso.Paura is the key word. Afraid of everything. Fear of making mistakes. Fear of not being up to the demands of her father. Fear of punishment that awaits him at the first misstep. Afraid to love. Fear of living. Only fear. The wounds of gratuitous violence - because it is - albeit disguised behind the word 'education', 'respect for parents', not heal easily. The humiliation, abuse of power by the subjugation of another, it means deprivation of their dignity as human being, 'ridimenzionato', reduced to obedience, 'straightened out' the will of another is deprived of its name and self to become something else. To become what the parent has in mind for them and not what you hear instead of being intimately, to become, to express. So far from education, the use of 'strong measures' results as well as the growth interruption, an interruption to life. A dominance and terror, which is nothing but a push to not exist. To hide. A close. A disappearing world and universe belong exclusively to his executioner that does something to shape it at will. It 's the law of the jungle. The abuse of power over the weak. The centuries pass, and history repeats itself with a ferocity unmatched. The 'father, master,' which seems to evoke images in nineteenth-century reality, even today, in the third millennium, it appears as a submerged but ubiquitous phenomenon, he continues to take in hand their children with physical and psychological violence, venting upon them anger over the years, of those who may in turn suffered the same treatment. All this can not be justified. You can do something? I think so. Institutions can do something. The school can do something. But you know, break down ignorance is the hardest thing in the world. Obviously the first thing you always talk about it. Do not be silent. Denounce. Educating parents and children to dialogue, to eradicate the concept of 'punishment' in this country, too often, is still space and supporters.
"There will come a day when education will be worth as a hundred foreign ministries" (T. Eliot)
Under a carry-over 'interview I did with a person who has really lived on her skin over the violence that I have tried to parse through the text - too few and too cold - To describe the pain, suffering, but also a desire for redemption, to return to live with those who have suffered an injustice, an abuse.
will therefore his words to make sense of my own.
Usually in the life of an adult's memories of childhood, early youth identify with and lighthearted moments we have experienced. In your case there must be a reversal of almost paradoxical in relation to this perception. Would you tell?
Unlike those who had a happy childhood, or at least balanced, who has been the father master, who can not identify all the past in one word "hell" and even if there were some good moments, are put aside, we do not think calmly but with deep bitterness toward what could be a constant rather than sporadic moments of "normal" I'm an adult who has over 30 some years yet I have clear memories of ' Children, beatings of my mother and I was trying to put myself in the middle to stop it, the barrel of me and my mother was put in the middle and took leiposso also mention two episodes just to give you an idea, the less raw but sums up everything you've written in precedenzanoi the ban had to go play in the room and it was even more so when they were forbidden to visit relatives with children of our etàuna evening I went to the latter prohibition against and I went with my sister and my cousin in the room to play, when they left my father railed against me took me by the wrist and threw me into the air, my hand ran into a glass frame and cut my , the scar is still evident there, but the thing that most impressed me is the fury in his eyes ..... it has always been his eyes in those moments and I could not understand why .... ... As for the second I've always had a mania for taking things apart and reassembling them, one day I had taken a lighter that did not work and dismounted, he noticed it and beating down, beating me on the edge of the temple a mobile me diets thrashing e. ......... after 10 minutes I looked I smiled, kissed me and said come down from playing ....... I was literally shocked on these two episodes I can tell you that I had not yet 10 years but I had already noticed his eyes full of violent and anger, confusion and bewilderment felt already, someone was playing with dolls and who was to be a doll ............ see how disruption of memories that can not be clean and deep, rather than remember and feel anger, bitterness, pain, it is preferred, at least for me so, pretend nothing has happened, not to talk or if you must, do it with fake posting to shame, it feels different than the others and can not otherwise be seen that this is what you were taught, diversi, inferiori, sottomessi, sbagliati, dove la propria personalità viene totalmente annullata.........
Quando si parla di violenza perpetrata tra le mura domestiche si pensa subito alla violenza fisica. Ma spesso è la violenza psicologica quella più difficile da superare. Quello che si ricorda maggiormente è la paura che un comportamentoviolento suscita nella sua vittima. E’ così?
Si è così, ma non solo......si ha paura di tutto, si ha paura di una reazione violenta da qualsiasi parte arrivi, che sia verbale o fisica poco importa in quel momento ci si sente spiazzati, bloccati si cerca in qualche modo di evitare lo scontro anche quando si è certi di avere ragione, anche maybe when the "danger" at that moment coming from someone who does not even know, and then hypothetically you might think "not him / her know that I care" is absolutely not so for me the terror comes not only from what I just wrote about, but also and above all I'm afraid of hurting others, of being violent as he was with me, he could not control myself, I have spent a lifetime fighting with myself for not being like him, I did not want to do is what I did at times I could not and I felt bad for guilt, then punivo myself, downloaded on myself all the frustration and anger, and even these scars are clearly visible.
What is astonishing and upsets when you hear about domestic violence is the silence, the silence that surrounds the victims. One wonders whether it is possible to overlook certain things, especially from people who have daily contact with us. What do you mean in that regard?
Usually in childhood and adolescence shape the way we relate to others, our ability to express feelings. What does a childhood broken in our ability to establish relationships in the age?
It 's a disaster. Do not you find a balance, or it tends to be too submissive or tends to be too aggressive or it closes and so better not to have any relationship, especially in the latter case because it is suspicious, we will feel out of place you always have that damn fear of failure modes, time, words, actions, or perhaps fear of being judged not to be able to explain their points of view, it is constantly on the alert for anything say a word and if the person to whom you say it does not give you a straight or a little makes a face 'like that or if it meets a po'così, you think, oh God, but I said? I was wrong! and starts the anxiety, the concern of any mistake by trying to fix small trying to clarify and if you receive reassurance, because you do not believe the mistake was made and it is unforgivable and you're also wrong to recover the heat more why do not you give peace to those who have been wrong in our view, be great to learn to manage it all by itself, does not change anything, change only rather than outsource it to you to hold yourself to others and not to break at some Now you maybe you would rather cut off six sociable but keep distances over a distance, you hide, make a world of your own and you hardly get any but when it happens there is the risk of becoming suffocating, obsessive and anxious, but this one happens to those who just can not find balance, for people like me than this great rock when it happens silently watches and tries to protect itself and only when there is a valid reason otherwise, the ratio is as normal as possible, but it is also true that in my world I do not get hardly any good because I'm in my intimacy, I care not only experience anxiety, guilt, feel bad for possibly the wrong word, to see and do not think anyone would think of all this knowing me and also who knows he does not know the details, I just at the surface as you can see the tendency is to quit but still add a detail, that one closes, which is sottomissivi, which is violent, however, was never alone because you want to be the opposite of what one is.
What would you say to those who today are suffering the same violence in silence?
To those who are suffering just want to say they did not feel wrong, it is not our fault, we have not done anything to suffer all this, but the mistake is not our life, talk talk talk, seek help, Get support from someone who can help especially psychologically, do not hold nothing inside, it is important that you have confidence in you and what you are, do not miss the pride and dignity always on top and above all do not lose trust in others, the master is possessive father, not to lose control of what that belongs to him and wants to shape his image and likeness, do not let you! become aware of what you are outside the family, outside of its control is the only way you will be able to find an identity that belongs only to you.
De Andrè sang the words "From the diamond does not come at all the flowers come from manure" ... It 's that? You can go back to love, to dream, to believe in a future better, not to mention - because it can not be forgotten - the wounds and pain?
Yes, but only if one believes, only if you decide to challenge themselves and get involved in every way you live in a double perspective, one part instinct, part the pure ragionel'istinto leads to reactions to decisions dictated by what has been, so it might be something violent, aggressive, submissive, etc. eccla reason instead of fear leads you to the heart, soul, and brings you to an opening towards love, to believe in a better future, to dream too, you know that all this depends on you and your skills, not about anything the father master, has only with themselves and the success or failure depends on us, and might seem a contradiction but also the failure becomes a satisfying because you did not fail but others depended on you and, consequently, this is a freedom you acquisitadunque, You can certainly believe in everything but unlike those who, fortunately, has not been all that, you have to fight, struggle, struggle and daily life but it's worth it and how, also because it means that in the end victory was ours, saying that despite everything he was beaten to the present relations are cordial with him, I see little but apart from special moments, I do not make any effect indeed is he who took me in I see great consideration and even respect for me but it's late though and could not be otherwise.
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